My process

Some have asked that I share more about my daily process than the casual references to writing with which I pepper my blog, and have demanded that I delve into the actual operations of a publishing juggernaut the likes of which are unique in the annals of self-publishing history.

In doing so, I thought I’d clear up some misconceptions. Namely that I lounge about in board shorts, swigging margaritas, tapping out an occasional paragraph between bouts of snorting coke off strippers’ bottoms and dodging the Federales. Would that it were so. A tremendous amount of work goes into this, so I’ll describe a typical day so you can be the judge.

First thing this morning there was a board meeting that seemed to go on forever.

Then there was a concept development session.

Followed by plotting.

I broke for lunch, but it was a working lunch, during which I interviewed virtual assistants.

Then I spent several hours at a PR event discussing my work and upcoming releases.

On the way home from the event, there was a traffic jam.

Then, back to the grindstone until dinner.

After a draining day, I took a little time out to recharge my batteries, because you can’t be all about just work. In order to write about life, you need to experience it.

As you can see, my existence is not an endless series of debauched adventures and aimless slacking. I stay to a rigid schedule, albeit one that has suitable flexibility to accommodate my creative bursts, and I put in the hours required to achieve my goals. Anyone who believes that being a bestselling author involves jotting down a few pages of meanderings between bouts of problem drinking and being chased by inebriated women off the cruise ships has a distorted view of what I do.

I hope I’ve been able to clear things up once and for all.

Now go buy my crap. Drinks ain’t free in these joints.